Monday, December 31, 2012

Farewell 2012...

Well, another year has come & gone again, but for some reason this one feels much different from the past.  Maybe it's because we experienced both the most exciting joy & deepest sorrow we have ever felt before.  Or maybe it's because the future we thought we were planning for in the early months, has been flipped upside down now and we are no longer sure what's ahead for us.  Regardless, I wanted to be sure to recap this year for my own benefit - to remember the good, the bad, and the ugly and more importantly, to hopefully one day see God's plan & reason behind what happened to us this year:

January - I started the year off with some hope & goals for the new, as well as a photo-a-day project that {I didn't know at the time} would continue throughout the rest of the year.  As with previous years, I also continued posting about some book reviews and shared more of my outfits through "What I Wore Wednesday".  I also shared my Leap List on the blog and completed my first item.

February - WIWW continued and I even started creating outfits from my Pinterest board.  I shared Sam + I's love story and a rare moment where we got to babysit my adorable niece for the day.  My photo-a-day's also continued with weekly posts.

March - More reviews, outfit posts, and photo-a-day posts this month, but I also completed another Leap List item {my first massage!} and we started on a big house project - installing laminate flooring throughout our house.  We also found out we were pregnant this month, although no one knew yet :)

April - This month didn't have a lot going on except trying to keep our baby news a secret, so I kept myself busy by seeing Wicked for the first time and hosting a Stella & Dot giveaway {which was a lot of fun & I'd love to host more in the future}.  I also continued my photo-a-day project.

May - Another relatively quiet month {mainly due to the unknown pregnancy - sensing a theme?} with the exception of my weekly photo-a-day recap posts, but we also had some fun this month.  Our niece turned one!  And we got away to Bend, OR for a little vacation between working on our floors some more.  Our families learned of our upcoming bundle of joy, although we continued to keep the blog world in the dark for another month.

June - The big baby news month!  Our niece helped share the news and in addition to sharing some pregnancy details, I also began my weekly posts about the pregnancy at 14 weeks.  I also posted a special shout-out to the fathers in our life because a new one {my husband!} would be becoming on in December.  Other notable posts from June - I updated my Leap List, continued photo-a-day recaps, and Sam & I celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary!

July - We started out this month with a trip to Nova Scotia {at 16 weeks pregnant} to see my dad and ended it with multiple doctor visits when they discovered a problem at our gender ultrasound.  I filled the month with photo-a-day recaps, reviews, and a Pinterest project, but this month sort of seems like a blur when I think back on it.

August - I took a break posting about the pregnancy for weeks 19 & 20 of the pregnancy due to the news we received in July, but shared some medical details around 21 weeks when we decided to put our trust and baby girl in God's hands and her name around 22 weeks {Charlotte}.  Due to the state of our pregnancy, we became labeled as "high risk" and began seeing a specialist every couple weeks for monitoring, measurements, and tests.  Through all of this, I clung to whatever normalcy I could find and continued my photo-a-day project to find some appreciation of the little things in life.

September - If I was to describe my feelings this month in one word, I would probably say it was "hopeful".  We had met with a few different doctors concerning our little girl's condition and while we knew it was serious, we also hoped that God would fix her little body if that was His plan.  Notable happenings for this month include: sharing a little bit about what was going through my head at the moment; participating in a scarf swap; posting my photo-a-day recaps; and attending two baby showers out of town for Charlotte + I {posted about in December}.

October - Another somewhat quiet month on the blog, with the exception of photo-a-day posts, pregancy updates, and reviews.  One exception was where I felt more hopeful in September, the feeling of hopelessness surrounding the pregnancy overcame my thoughts in October, which I shared about around 32 weeks.  To take my mind off worrying, I started a weekly post called Friday Favorites {I featured Lisa Leonard & HelloBee this month}, which share some blogs & sites that have become must-reads for me throughout the years.

November - More pregnancy updates, reviews, Friday Favorites {iHeart Organizing, Influenster, I Love You More Than Carrots, Jonathan David Photography, and The Four Gift Rule}, and photo-a-day recaps this month.  We also shared Charlotte's scheduled birthday - 12.12.12 - around 36 weeks, after we were transferred up to Legacy Emanuel in Portland, OR for the remainder of our pregnancy.  And due to the nature of the month, I also shared why I was most thankful this year...

December - Also known as the month we've been waiting for!  I started out the month posting about the amazing baby showers that were thrown for us over the last couple months, as well as a Friday Favorite {The Dough Will Rise Again} and finishing out my year-long photo-a-day project.  Then before we knew it, we had made it to 39 weeks & the day finally came that we would finally be meeting our precious baby girl.  Charlotte René Grable was born on 12.12.12 at 2:35pm, but sadly, we had to say goodbye to her far too soon on 12.21.12 at around 11:30am, only 9 short days after we met her.  I tried to put our feelings into words and find meaning for why this all happened, but a lot of if is still in my heart, which is, honestly, where it might stay for the unforeseeable future...  However, I did want to document Charlotte's short, but love-filled life, so you can read about her here & here.

This year was tough.  As I mentioned above, we experienced such a range of emotions this year that I'm not sure how many I have left {except for indescribable sadness and desire to hold Charlotte in my arms again}.  As 2012 comes to an end, I pray that I never forget this year and what it brought us, but that I am also able to move forward and see Charlotte in everything beautiful ahead of us.


  1. I love that you're able to point out so much good in your year, despite the sadness. You are such a strong woman. I hope you know that!

    I pray that 2013 brings you many blessings!

  2. Hi Meaghan. I was just reading through your blog for the first time in a while and read about your loss. Although we don't really know each other, I wanted to say that I am SO sorry for your loss and that I am thinking about you and your family. Take Care. Stay strong.

    - Sara